Our Friend

Last night I saw the movie Our Friend, a true story based on the article "The Friend" written by journalist Matthew Teague about his wife's death in Esquire magazine.  It is an incredibly moving story about the power of friendship that had me in tears several times.  Matt (Casey Affleck) is a journalist who is frequently away from home on assignment.  His wife Nicole (Dakota Johnson), an actress involved in community theatre, is often resentful about having to care for their two daughters Molly (Isabella Kai) and Evie (Violet McGraw) by herself.  Their friend Dane (Jason Segel) is a bit of a lost soul who wants to be a stand-up comic and have a family of his own but works a dead-end job at a sporting goods store and can't seem to commit to any of his girlfriends.  When Nicole's cancer diagnosis becomes terminal, Dane decides to move in with the Teagues to help out in their obviously overwhelmed household (running errands, making dinner, doing laundry, chauffeuring the girls, etc.) but he ends up helping the family mend their relationships and deal with their grief which, ultimately, helps him to heal.  The story is a very accurate portrait of the realities of cancer and how it affects patients (physically, emotionally, and mentally), their families, and their friends.  There are some incredibly poignant scenes where Matt drives through the neighborhood and sees all of their friends who are supposed to be at Nicole's book club, where Dane convinces an exhausted Matt, who feels guilty about leaving, to take a break and go hiking, and where Nicole angrily lashes out and accuses everyone of wanting her dead.  All three actors are absolutely brilliant.  I am a huge fan of Affleck and his performance in this movie almost rivals that in Manchester by the Sea for the rawness of his muted anger and grief.  Johnson gives an incredibly authentic performance, one of her best, in an emotionally complex role.  However, I was most impressed with Segel whose touching portrayal of a man at loose ends is somehow able to make the audience laugh and cry (sometimes in the same scene) and I especially loved his interactions with Kai and McGraw (the scene where the three of them sing "Call Me Maybe" made me laugh out loud).  I loved the use of Led Zeppelin in the soundtrack, particularly "Ramble On" in a bucket list montage and "Going to California" as Matt drives through the neighborhood.  My only issue with this movie is the non-linear narrative structure because, while it does effectively establish the impact of the diagnosis by jumping back and forth between before and after, it is sometimes difficult to follow the timeline.  This is a heartbreaking but, ultimately, life-affirming movie and I highly recommend it (bring tissues).