Slender Man

Horror movies are hit and miss with me.  I like to be genuinely scared but movies that can actually scare me are few and far between (go here and here).  However, the premise for Slender Man seemed pretty terrifying so I went to see it Saturday afternoon.  Four teens, Wren (Joey King), Hallie (Julia Goldani Telles), Chloe (Jaz Sinclair), and Katie (Annalise Basso), become fascinated by the urban legend of Slender Man and decide to watch a video that will summon him in order to disprove the myth.  When one of them disappears, the other three try to make contact with him and are subsequently terrorized.  Not only is this movie not scary but it is incredibly boring.  The filmmakers took a promising subject, a truly creepy internet meme with tragic real world repercussions, and, not knowing where to go with the story, incorporated every image from every horror film we've ever seen into a jumbled mess that went on and on...and on.  The only other person in my screening actually left half way through!  A derivative script might be forgiven but the execution is just as bad.  The lighting, or lack thereof, is terrible and makes it difficult to see what is happening (which is not much).  It is almost as if the filmmakers thought a spooky atmosphere would be an adequate substitute for a story.  The editing is haphazard at best and some scenes make absolutely no sense, particularly one in a science lab (I heard that this particular scene was edited from the original to get the PG-13 rating but it should have been cut altogether if that is the case). The acting is absolutely abysmal but you can't really fault these young actresses because their characters are so one-dimensional.  The most interesting character with an actual backstory is the first one to disappear.  This movie is an absolute mess and I definitely recommend giving it a miss.